It’s sad that so many things rely on money. I currently feel like I’m waiting for my paycheck, so I can pay off some bills and then start doing more things again. Money holds a lot of anxiety for me, and I think especially being a student for the last three years but not wanting to live like a student has put pressure on my finances. Pot Noodles are not a meal. I don’t want to talk a lot about money on my blog because I think it’s such a personal thing, and it stresses me out too much. So, change of topic please!
I’ve been going to therapy every Monday for the last few weeks and I think this has been helping me out a lot. Therapy is a strange process, there’s no specific goal that you are working towards but it takes a lot of effort, emotions and energy. You really have the trust the process, which is a bit scary. I think it’s a great tool for looking at things differently. Having a different perspective on events going on in your life really makes you think about how you reacted, how to fix something or even just be more understanding of the situation. An important lesson I’ve learnt, very recently, is when I’m feeling low my natural instinct is to internalise and create this bubble under some blankets and behind the TV, which I think is safe. When actually it’s very harmful. I can be quite stubborn when I get to this place and think well, no one has messaged me so they obviously don’t care. But the fact is, reaching out when we are feeling low is so important. And how can someone know I am feeling upset, or a bit down etc, if I don’t actually tell them. So, reach out. To your friends, family, work colleagues if you feel a bit shit. That gives them an opportunity to support you and maybe just offer to take you for a coffee and allowing you to exit the blanket and TV bubble.
I am incredibly happy The Great British Bake Off is back! Partly because I have a soft spot for Noel Fielding. I’m working until 20:00 most Tuesdays at the moment so I will be playing catch up each week (no spoilers please!) I’m hoping watching will give me some inspiration for my own bakes. A few friends have said I should apply but I really don’t think I have the technical ability at the moment. And, I wonder how I would come across on telly! Would people like me? Or would I just sing Mighty Boosh songs to Noel?
When I was doing this bake I managed to curdle the salted caramel mousse, which is an easy fix. As soon as you spot cream curdling, stop the mixer, add some fresh unwhisked cream, and then whisk. Unfortunately I didn’t have anymore cream so off to Lidl I popped and had to start all over again. This just meant I got to spend more time baking though! The recipe is for a 15cm cake tin. My dad got me the cake tins I’m going to use for the wedding cake I am making so I was keen to test them out!
100g Dark Chocolate, at least 70%
Butter and line the cake tin. The grease proof paper will come in handy after the mousse has chilled. Heat a fan assisted oven to 180 degrees Celsius.
Melt the chocolate and butter in a bowl over a pan of boiling water, making sure the water doesn’t touch the bottom of the bowl.
Whisk the sugar and egg together until light in colour. Slowly pour in the melted chocolate and whisk together. Add the flour and whisk until incorporated. Bake for 20 minutes. Keep in the tin and set aside to cool fully.
1 Punnet of raspberries (set aside 4 for decorating later)
Put the raspberries and sugar in a pan and slowly bring to boil. I like to use a fork to squish my raspberries but to maintain a bit of texture. Keep on the heat until it starts to thicken then place in a bowl and set aside until later.
60mls Double Cream
1 tsp salt
1/2 + 1/4 tsp Gelatin Powder
180mls Double Cream
Add the sugar to a pan and heat gently. Keep moving around the pan and it will slowly start the melt (trust me, it will). Keep on the heat until it goes golden in colour, watch it because it can burn quickly. Take off the heat and add the butter being careful because it will bubble up. Then add the 60mls of cream and salt.
Mix the gelatin with some cold water, about two teaspoons. Then add into the caramel. Whist this is cooling keep stirring it so it doesn’t start setting.
Whisk the 180mls of cream until it’s softly whipped. Pour in the caramel and fold together. Add a layer of the jam to the top of the brownie, and pour on the salted caramel mousse.
Pop in the fridge overnight, or if you’re impatient like me, at least 4 hours. I decorated mine with some melted chocolate and fresh raspberries. In this recipe the salt really brings out the raspberry flavour. I’ve already had three slices.